Lost in wilderness

It came to me as  a jolt.

A intangible push shaking your entire existence.

A coerce voice which is not generally appreciated as it pierces though the ears and injures every inch of your body. I heard the sound. The sound of breaking shackles that were so successfully caging my otherwise competent body.

Do you know what is more poisonous that venom?

It is wallowing in self pity, underestimating your own ideas and cribbing over wrong choices. The fact is there are no wrong choices. There are no mistakes. Everything is a learning and ever move is a feedback.

Sometime silent in form of gestures.

Sometime loud and heart wrenching in form of pain and agony. However in the every end it is the learning and a desire to move ahead and achieve the unattainable.


Pancakes or marmalade?

High school love or the extremely successful woman at work?

Vacation with family or a really important community meeting?

What are these?

Choices or pretence of caging an otherwise free animal?

How many times do we feel caged?

Not with some options but with something more than that, how many times have we felt this suffocation chocking us to near death? Be it that government, the country, the society sometime long avoided question from family. Are these instances caging us or are asking us to stop caging ourselves and go with the wind.

Recently in a TED talk I heard a beautiful Pakistani women speak of fighting physical deformities to achieve greater heights. One line that distinctly struck me in her speak was– “ there are some people in this world who wake up every morning with a big smile on their face while constantly fighting a war inside them- I call them warriors”.


Why did this line strike me so distinctly? Because I went “Whoa!! So I am not alone in this world who is on an incessant war with life?

Going deeper I suddenly realised how trivial my issues , my concerns and my objectives are when compared to people scattered across the globe.

I suddenly felt rejuvenated and I heard cracking sound of invisible chains which were slowly breaking around me.


What is your definition of higher purpose?

A Lamborghini? a yatch in Chicago?  Marriage? Making partners with McKinsey? The list might be endless. But the question is do you even understand my question? Does materialistic dreams even qualify as higher purpose.

The only purpose that one should have is to inspire others to rise up and shine rather than pulling them down with a negative aura.

I personally have people whom I am happy to have lost in this journey of life. I am personally proud to have people whom I am happy to have meet and kept them back in my life. In this little journey of 26 years I have seen excruciatingly selfish people and again I have meet people who have selflessly loved me and pulled me up when I was wallowing in the darkest pits. Ironically I failed to value the second set of people until recently.


I have lost a lot in life, love, faith, friendship, individuality and dreams but in this entire process I have evolved as a person. A wholesome aura is conceived all around me and I have stopped looking at boundaries around me . I have grown manifold and have learnt to build a wall  to filter out people and keep in the rest. I have learnt the art of letting go. It is beautiful to sit numb in a dark corners for a while and see some dreams slipping out of your fingers and then raising up and going on  the war again. I have just learn to become a better me.

In this journey I cannot thank god for all the hurdles thrown at me, introducing me to the hidden aspects of my own personality. Learning to change the not so good things about me. Slowly watch my innocence die and evolve into a better and greater me

About Asarkr

A decisive soul| passionate writer| Statistics and Maths geek| Loves Chicago| Toastmasters| Data maniac| Marketing Person| TEDx | Permanent procrastinator| Social flagbearer| Education evangelist| Co founder Marketingthingy/Socialthingy| Winner standing alone :) Contact: amritasarkar1709@gmail.com
This entry was posted in life and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s